so i made a mistake on thursday, quite a big one actually. went out with all the friendlings, it was the last time we'll all be together before everyone goes off to uni. we have a blast, dancing to 90's music in babylon and drinking appletinis and sex on the beach's. raving and moshing a bit in planet with shots :)
but i let my guard down, i let someone who hurt me charm their way through my carefully constructed defences. i let him dance with me and i let him kiss me. it felt nice to be wanted like that again but i soon came to my senses. and the next morning i realised that it didn't hurt so much when we agreed it wouldn't happen again which means that i'm not as affected as i thought i would be. i let go a long time ago, just hadn't realised how completely i had moved on.
i was even able to watch him pine over another girl the next night and hope it works our for him and then i laughed a little because i've been there.
i wish i could go off to uni. a new adventure to conquer. instead i'm replaying this level, trying to get a higher score. lady luck better stop hiding now.
Kez*
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