the plan unfolds

God has answered my prayers. or rather patted me on the head while his plan unfolds and i sit in despair and frustration. I have a job

it's not so fun but i have one and i'm making money (well i will be after training). I am now a waitress at a steak ranch. The training is so different, not like England at all. no froms, no procedures. i must just stand and listen and learn. that's their philosophy. hmmm not sure which i prefer.and i have come to the conclusion that i must basically train myself.
my only hope is impressing costomers to get good tips.

anyway i have a job. i am better off than most in this country.
The people of Japan are in my prayers. God bless

frustration doesn't even cover it

no I don't have a job yet. yes i'm still living joburg with my family and yes i'm frustrated out of my mind!
both my mother and i are searching for jobs, hers obviously more important. she's had an interview. didnt get it. she applied to others and got responses like "this position is only for black applicants" WHAT THE HELL!
South Africa is not over it's racist past, don't you believe it what people say!
while i'm happy to be home. recent events highlight why we thought we could find a better life in England.
i'll keep trying and hold my head high.

in the mean time, we're sorting through family junk which has accumulated over the years and i found some old diaries. it's strange to read back on them but it's so enlightening. my teenage mind was so insecure. there was a lot i worried about. a lot has changed but not so much either.

P.S. my results for exams come out this month. hurry up already :)

eat. pray. love review :)

I have finished it. and it definitely got me thinking.


I love the idea that she studied different religions. the problem i have is sometimes i thinks she picks out aspects of the religion and uses it her way. if you're going to do that, you can't really say it's from that specific religion. it's taking it out of the context that it was intended to be used. It's like those people who use Bible verses to justify some actions; they've taken it out of context and used to their benefit.

but i do understand thet this was her journey, specific to her and she writes it beautifully. especially when describing the people she meets. it' one of the reasons i love travelling.

i also like her take on this connection we have with God and how the 'universe' (dont know what other word to use) binds everything together. everything is connected.

all in all i like the book and will read it again in the future

frustration

every single plan I've made since i've got here has crashed and burned (and then exploded for good measure)!

working as a camp counsilor in america apparently cost between R9 000 and R12 000 WHY do they advertise less?! maybe that's a stupid question but it would have saved me a lot of typing about my qualities and skills if they just advertised truthfully. I think one of the skills they test is essay writing. the amount of personal statements that I wrote...

anyway the other option in a working holiday somewhere so i look into New Zealand. South Africans aren't welcome -_- we are not allowed visas!

now i'm looking into australia or maybe even china or maybe i'll just explore good old south africa some more. i haven't seen a lot of it. i'd like to see the drakensburg mountains, maybe even climb some of it if i feel active :)

so i'm keeping my chin up and my eyes open for opportunities

on other matters; i went fishing yesterday. ok we didn't catch anything but while i was standing thigh-deep in the water, i thought "this is nice". we had a braai (barbeque) behind us and the sun above us. it was idyllic.

It's good to be home

eat.pray.love

I bought Eat.Pray.Love today.
started reading it but i'm not sure about it yet. i love the idea of picking up and setting off to travel for a year. she has this sens of humour which lets me forgive her sometimes (i want to say arrogant but that's not what i mean) way of writing.
to be continued...

holding my breath

is it ok to miss something just because it's easy?
or familiar?
or so unlike what you have?
only nostalgia
because i'm somewhere where things are moving slowly
exciting slowness
building
preparing
for the big bright future

home sweet home

First blog from Africa :)

sorry took so long. been a bit lazy like
i made it. long hours flying. sat next to an american girl who coughed all over me for 6 hours but i did have some space on the other flight. was scorchingly hot when we arrived. bliss
just recovered from a cold (probs from airplane girl) and internet is a bit slow so i'll try my best with posts :D

nothing to do yet. just enjoying the sun. looking into uni applications.
APPLIED TO DO CAMP AMERICA TODAY!! EXCITEMENT!!
i had to write a personal statement. ok so i haven't actually finished it yet hehe but i will. so exciting :)

laters
kez x

so close!

i leave on WEDNESDAY!!! only two and a half days left and in that time i have to write a Maths exam ¬_¬
not impressed.
but alas i will see the SUN soon and i'll be happy.
SOUTH AFRICA here i come :D

A New Look

i've decided to revamp my blog. a nice backround and beautiful colours.
if only i knew how to make a header thing to go behind the title :S
but i like it :)

leaving

Some pictures of nights out. each night the same excuse: " this will be your goodbye leaving thing" love it x

sean's (the one with the funny face) 19th. wore dikkie ties :)

:) wooo lovely night

new years, glowstick thing :D

work leaving do

i love this dress x

window cleaner

I woke up this morning to voices downstairs. i didn't pay much attention to what they were saying and just assumed that my mother was doing some more organising as usual and went back to sleep. Only to be woken again with a strange sound coming from outside my window. Considering that my room is on the top storey, i found this a bit odd. I opened the curtains and nearly had, and nearly gave, a heartattack. there was a man staring back at me with a cloth in his hand, trying not to fall off his ladder. a window cleaner. and then we both laughed
those are the events of my morning, i thought i'd share my ridiculousness

Mumford & Sons - The Cave

love love love

empty house

slowly but with increasing speed, the house is emptying around me. in a couple of days i will be sleeping on the couch because we have sold our beds. haha might set up a tent with a sleeping bag for the full effect.

i have my last exam on monday and then i'm jetsetting to AFRICA, my home :)
it's been strange trying to balance everything. i've said goodbye to everyone and now i'm kind of in limbo. i want to see my friends again before i go but i know it won't make a difference. it'll just mean more goodbyes. i've had excellent control, not a single tear in their presence. i hate crying in front of people, i usually leave it for when i'm alone.

so everything is finally coming together. now to just fit everything in my suitcase :/

Hotel Rwanda

hatred, sadness, love, kindness, compassion, violence, anger
humans are capable of all of these.
did you know the rwanda genocide left more than a million people dead not to mention all the people who had their lives destoyed. this happened 15 years ago. i was alive when this happened.
i feel absolutley useless. i feel like i should be somewhere offering my hands up to service

Michael Bublé - Home

2010

i got bored of doing the 2010 posts so for the rest of 2010. just look at the previous posts :D
it's been a good year
2011 here i come. home again in SOUTH AFRICA